Tag Archives: Jac’s Illness & Death

Jim Perrin goes to ground

The physical assault on our nephew of the previous evening was so very shocking; it was an extraordinary attack: unprovoked and wicked.  Mercifully it did not end, as it could have done, in a greater tragedy — a little more force, pressure on a certain point in the neck? — there was a complete lack of any attempt at control, and the pain and the bruising were severe; luckily the intervention of others brought the episode to an end. (Although her son did report Jim Perrin’s attack on him to the police the following day.)

What could Jim Perrin do after such a display of fury and violence?  How could he now redeem himself?

He locked himself in his caravan and would not come out…

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He would not at first communicate at all, until finally, speaking to our sister by telephone from his caravan to the house, he threatened to commit suicide. For hours that day he put our sister and her daughter through the most intense emotional turmoil: clearly, he was quite unbalanced, and indulging himself in hysteria…

Our niece, when in her bedroom later, heard her mother crying and sobbing in her own room and went along the corridor. It was apparent from what she overheard that Jim Perrin was threatening to kill himself and that her mother was pleading with him to do no such thing — yet, young as she was, uncertain and fearing to intrude she waited awhile outside the bedroom door rather than go into her mother’s room.

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Swallow Falls

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When our sister was given her diagnosis of cancer she chose not to tell her partner, Jim Perrin. On coming home from the hospital she withheld the news in order to protect him — deciding instead, despite her own new terror, to give him no worry; no extra cause for grief or concern.

Jac knew how hard it was for him — how anguished he was, following the recent and unexpected death of his son. And with the book — which he later described in a letter to her as ‘This book which has been an albatross for years’ — nearing completion*, she did everything she could to give him the peace and tranquility he required for his work.

Despite all her efforts though, unfortunately they were never sufficient: he, in his newly bereaved distress, would not ‘let go’ and continued as before to compare unfavourably (with his usual criticism and accusation) the actions and behaviour of her sons with those of his own — the son now lost to him.

How could one imagine Jim Perrin’s sense of devastation — his own son no longer there? Not ‘lost’ through illness or by accident — but in the last despairing act of his own hand; whilst our sister’s sons, for whom he felt no affinity and whom he disliked to the point of detestation, were alive and very much in evidence with their youth and natural vitality. (‘Detestation’ is not a facile exaggeration. Later, Jim Perrin went on to assault Jac’s younger son in a physical attack — an incident which was reported to, and logged by, the police.) Continue reading →

Our account of Jac’s illness — part four

After Jac’s ‘Welsh’ sister arrived at the ‘Countess of Chester’ hospital early on that Wednesday morning she was taken aside and it was explained to her how very serious Jac’s condition had become: she had fallen into a deep coma from which the nurses said there was virtually no chance she would awaken and she could die at any moment. Terribly shocked by the unexpected news she went to Jac’s room, and found her, as she had been warned, in stillness and silence. Speaking quietly to her she told her that she would try to contact the family. The nurses had explained that Jac possibly might yet hear what was said to her, as it is known that this aspect of consciousness is often still receptive near the end of life, so she begged Jac to wait for her daughter. She told her that she was trying her utmost to reach her, asking her to wait and telling her that she would soon be there — that she was coming. ‘Oh please Jac do wait for her, she will need to be with you.’

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Attempts to contact Jim Perrin had failed. The house phone was not answered; his mobile was switched off and no message could be left.  Time was dwindling and Jac’s daughter, who was an art student in a nearby town but who had no phone of her own, had to be found if it was at all possible. More phone calls — it took several to locate her. Our sister telephoned Jac’s ‘first love’, in Cumbria, telling him how grave things were and asking him if he would try to contact Jim Perrin, as she had  been unable to do so, and also Jac’s youngest son, who was in Argentina.  He managed to achieve both, although Jim Perrin said, rather strangely, ‘he would be along later — as soon as he could’. Sadly Jac’s eldest son who was supply teaching in Yorkshire also had his mobile switched off and we had no idea which school he was in. Continue reading →